CARRY ON

Being from Detroit, I was (and proudly, still am) a Motown junkie. Even though Motown Records had moved to LA by the time I really began to appreciate the music, it did not matter. Diana Ross, The Supremes, Marvin Gaye, The Temptations, Stevie Wonder---MAGIC.

I remember my first Diana Ross concert. It was at The Ford Auditorium in downtown Detroit. It was in the late 70s. I went with my mom, my grandmother, my best friend. I think I was in junior high. The concert was awesome, but what I remember most was my grandmother getting up out of her seat with her program, going a few rows in front of us and getting autographs from Diana's brother, mother, and and Aretha Franklin. I still have that program. Classic.

Carry on.

Who would have thought that a handful of years later that my grandmother would be propping up her daughter (my mom) and her sons, after her daughter's husband abruptly left the home, the marriage, the family. Were it not for her, I do not know what would have become of us. Because of her, the bills were paid, there was food on the table and there was a sense that love was still around us.

Carry on.

My first therapist in New York was a psychoanalyst. Susan was wonderful. She helped me through some particularly difficult times as I wrestled with family issues, especially my history with my dad. Through weekly sessions and group therapy, I was able to let go of so much of the critical talk that had hindered me for most of my life and I began to understand that I was not responsible for all of this pain.

Carry on.

I am in awe of those who come into my office seeking relief. For many, they have been let down by those who should have been taking care of them and loving them. They have endured, they have felt pain, they have gingerly walked through life, not being able to trust themselves or others. I am inspired by the leap of faith they take when they sit on my couch and attempt to trust a complete stranger in the hopes that just maybe, things will begin to look and feel a little brighter.

Carry on.

None of this is easy. But the lesson here is that it does not have to be done alone. It is risky to go against "what you know" and trust an outsider. It is risky to open up the box of pain, secrets, and shadows and begin the process of setting them free. It is risky to contemplate another way of being. It is risky, it is risky, it is risky. But for a second, try to imagine what your life could look like "if I did set this stuff free."

It could be pretty amazing.

Carry on.

(By the way, I used "Carry On" because it is on my running tape and Diana Ross sings it. There's the connection!)